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Daily Prompt

Daily Prompt: Quote Me

Do you have a favorite quote that you return to again and again? What is it, and why does it move you?

Dearest reader, I have acquired many new followers recently, and not all of you are familiar with my certain brand of sickness.  Therefore, I’d like to kindly advise you NOT to read any further if you are easily offended.  

Yes, DP, I have a favorite quote that I return to time and time again.  My favorite quote is deep.  It’s madly philosophical.  It’s a thinking man’s quote.  It’s a quote which sparks tireless debate everywhere it is uttered.  And similar to “What came first, the chicken or the egg?” there’s really no clearcut answer.

Well, I was wrong. Evidently the egg came first.

My quote was coined by Windsor Horne Lockwood III, a hideously hilarious character from the Myron Bolitar series by Harlan Coben.  The quote is:

If you clone yourself and then have sex with your self, is it considered incest or masturbation?

As you can reasonably deduce, plausible arguments can be made for both sides of the, erm, argument.

Is it incest?  Well, technically you are related to yourself.  You share the same genes as yourself.  You have the same parents as yourself.  There’s not necessarily a proper term to describe the relationship you have with yourself, but you most certainly came swimming from the same gene pool.  So technically, if you have sex with yourself it could, and should, be considered incest.

Is it masturbation? Well, you are fucking yourself and isn’t that the very definition of masturbation?

Ultimately, I have decided that the answer is both.  It’s both incest and masturbation because both terms apply.  But I love this quote because of the debate that ensues after it’s spoken and the hilarity of said debates.

And, because it’s Friday Foolishness day over at Guapola, I’ll even let a poll decide the answer.

And now, it’s time for that very debate.  What say you, dear reader?  Incest or masturbation?

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66 thoughts on “Daily Prompt: Quote Me

  1. I concur that the best answer is both.


    Posted by dmauldin53 | January 4, 2013, 11:39 am
  2. It’s homosexual masturcest.


    Posted by Rutabaga the Mercenary Researcher | January 4, 2013, 11:41 am
  3. “We all pay for life with death, so everything in between should be free.” Bill Hicks.
    That’s one of my favorites. Pretty clear and concise.


    Posted by DUH'Merica | January 4, 2013, 12:57 pm
  4. Aside from picking the obvious choice (Seriously, what the hell is wrong with you?), I’d submit that if you have time to ask, you’re doing it wrong.

    Thanks for the pingback! Oh, and the egg came first.
    Glad to clear that up for ya!


    Posted by El Guapo | January 4, 2013, 1:05 pm
  5. I concur that you have something seriously wrong with you. Like a doctor. (Do you see what I did there?) Also, that if you had a clone of yourself, it would make more sense to send it out for pizza or something. As fabulous as I am, i don’t think I’d have sex with me. For one thing, I’m not gay (not that there is anything wrong with being gay). Didn’t think of that, did you? It can be gay masturbating incest.

    I have thought too long about this.


    Posted by aliceatwonderland | January 4, 2013, 2:00 pm
  6. Incest no, doesn’t bear thinking about. But masturbation, sure, I’ll go with that option, no problems. ;)
    Thanks for the pingback by the way, damn nice of ya. :)


    Posted by sarahneeve | January 4, 2013, 3:58 pm
  7. I really don’t know what to say… But this post rocked!


    Posted by The Hook | January 4, 2013, 4:46 pm
  8. I’m not sure what goes on in that head of yours to even come up with this question, but I’ll perform my civic blogger duty and respond with…masturbation. As the mother of a teenage boy I hope to god he never clones himself. I’m already going through wholesale sized bottles of conditioner and industrial sized bundles of paper towels as it is..I couldn’t afford 2!


    Posted by Life With The Top Down | January 4, 2013, 7:34 pm
  9. You didn’t include my choice in your poll: Oy Vey.

    And I am sooooo glad I didn’t open this one at work!


    Posted by Elyse | January 4, 2013, 7:51 pm
  10. Masturbation definitely. You are basically playing with yourself…and seriously wtf is wrong with you. ;-). Hilarious.


    Posted by 1jaded1 | January 4, 2013, 11:01 pm
  11. You are witty as ever. Thanks for the pingback.


    Posted by seeker | January 5, 2013, 3:45 am
  12. I concur (like a doctor) that it’s both.
    But I have a few questions. On one hand, you are the one person in the world that knows what you like. On the other hand, what if you realize that you are not as good in bed as you thought? And does this make you bisexual?
    Your self esteem. What does this do to your self esteem? Are you more empowered? Or do you hate yourself because YOU are the only person who is willing to sleep with you.
    I think too much. And everyone thinks that there is something wrong with you


    Posted by MissFourEyes | January 6, 2013, 3:16 am
    • On the other hand, what if you realize that you are not as good in bed as you thought?

      Then no one else will know plus you have the added advantage of practicing to get better without anyone knowing that you’re practicing to get better.

      And does this make you bisexual?

      That depends. If you masturbate does that make you bisexual? (I think this is another blog topic). I guess, technically it would since you’re having sex with someone of the same sex.

      Your self esteem. What does this do to your self esteem? Are you more empowered? Or do you hate yourself because YOU are the only person who is willing to sleep with you.

      Just because you’re banging you’re clone doesn’t mean no one else will sleep with you. Well, it probably does but it doesn’t preclude the possibility of sex with some one else. As for self esteem, I guess your performance would be what affects that. If you’re good you’re going to feel good. If you suck (not in THAT way) then you’ll feel bad about yourself.


      Posted by twindaddy | January 6, 2013, 10:24 pm
  13. I think you just catapulted yourself to the top of my favorite bloggers to read list (in my head). Congrats. Laughed the whole way through this post :P


    Posted by vyvacious | January 6, 2013, 6:31 pm

We don't tolerate scum.

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