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Random Thought Of The Day

Random Thought of the Day: A dog isn’t for Christmas?

On my way to work this morning I was behind some sort of SUV.  That in itself is not all that important and it certainly isn’t the reason I started this post.  I’m sure that even you, dearest reader, have been behind an SUV at some point and you didn’t care either.

The reason that this SUV was notable to me is because it had a bumper sticker on the back of it that read:

A dog is for life, not just for Christmas

A likeness of the offending bumper sticker.

This really struck me.  I mean, the only time I ever think about my dog is on Christmas when I give her a stocking full of squeaky toys with which to annoy me.  The other 364 days of the year I don’t even know she exists.  Today is an exception solely because of this bumper sticker.  Who has time to think about their dog?  And why bother?  They feed themselves.  They can let themselves out when they have to pee or poop (heh heh, poop).  Hell, some of them even use the toilet.  They can even get their own water to fill up their bowl.  And most importantly, they can reach their genitals with their mouths.  That provides endless entertainment to all of them.

So what gives?  Why do I need to think about my dog more often than just Christmas?  In search of answers I really don’t care about but will pursue anyway just for the sake of this blog post, I turn to Google.  What, you thought I’d go somewhere else?  Silly reader, Bing is for newbs.

My search proved fruitful on the first result I clicked on.  That’s like winning the lottery, folks.  Seriously.  How often is Google that good?

Google led me to this site, which claims that this is their slogan and was created by Clarissa Baldwin, their Chief Executive, in 1978.  Per the page:

The longstanding campaign aims to raise awareness of the consequences of treating dogs as gifts or toys. Every year hundreds of thousands of children plead for the latest fad or top toy on the market, only to discard them a few weeks after Christmas when the novelty wears off. Unfortunately, the same perception is also apparent with dogs. We are continually seeking to change this.

Wait, you mean dogs aren’t just neat Christmas gifts with which to appease spoiled children?  You can’t just give them to anybody?  Not even as a prank gift?  Dammit.  That really throws a wrench into my holiday plans for this year.  What a giant, steaming pile of suck.

In all seriousness, if you don’t recognize that having a pet is a huge commitment prior to owning one, looking at this slogan and understanding its meaning is just not going to happen.  People who love pets are going to take care of them.  People who get them just to shut their children up do not and will not give a shit.

I love my dog, even though she’s a pain in the ass sometimes.  More importantly, our family loves our dog.  We all pitch in taking care of her.  We take turns taking her out, feeding her, and playing with her.  I don’t need to be told that owning a dog is a huge committment.  That should be readily apparent, but evidently it isn’t to some people, and that’s sad.

This is my wonderful dog, She has her moments, but I love her and couldn't imagine life without her.

This is my wonderful dog, She has her moments, but I love her and couldn’t imagine life without her.

This slogan, to me, is akin to a product warning such as “don’t use this hair dryer in the shower” or “Preparation H is for external use only.”  These are things you shouldn’t have to be told, but for some reason there are people out there that just don’t get it.  It’s a sad reflection on our society that slogans such as these need to be created.  A sad reflection, indeed.

So, to sum everything up nicely, stop being stupid, assholes.  If you can’t or don’t want to take care of a dog then don’t get one.


  • As I was scanning in the computers I received today, I forgot to switch my active window to my Excel sheet and scanned the serial number of a computer into a chat window with my wife.  She was mildly perplexed.
    me:  (computer serial number)
    Superbitch:  ?
    me:  wrong window active…
    Superbitch:  …
    me:  i know.  i failed
    Superbitch:  Uh huh
    me:  yeah
  • Typed Perparation H instead of Preparation H.
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29 thoughts on “Random Thought of the Day: A dog isn’t for Christmas?

  1. Agree on all accounts….I love my dog more than I love some people in my life. She’s just that much smarter than they are…..sigh.


    Posted by Polysyllabic Profundities | January 14, 2013, 11:27 am
  2. Sick, sad, dumbasses. The shelter we are adopting our dog from will not allow people to take any animals around the holiday for this very reason. My doggie will be treated as a member of the family!


    Posted by Nicole Marie | January 14, 2013, 11:38 am
  3. My sister-in-law has worked in the local shelter for decades. It is a real problem, and tons of dogs and cats and assorted other animals are dumped at the shelter in January. In the spring, duckies and chicks that have outgrown Easter baskets end up there. It is horrible.

    As a dog lover, I find it particularly horrible that folks do it with dogs. A dog would never do that to its human.


    Posted by Elyse | January 14, 2013, 12:03 pm
  4. I completely agree with you. It is sad. I love my dog more than anything. It’s like taking care of a baby (a smarter, louder, faster baby) I don’t understand why people would adopt one just for fun.

    (tee hee poop)


    Posted by MissFourEyes | January 14, 2013, 12:41 pm
  5. Dogs are awesome. I love my dog even if he did wake me up at 6am the other day! I’m also loving the outtakes.


    Posted by stephrogers | January 14, 2013, 3:27 pm
  6. I don’t get bumper stickers like that. Like the ones that say you should believe in Jesus. That’s a pretty big decision. I’m just no sure where I stand on . . . ohhhh, hey, it’s on the back of an SUV. I now know who I will worship. Thanks!

    As far as dogs go, don’t you remember Lady and the Tramp? Lady is put in a stocking with a red bow around her neck. Merry freaking Xmas, honey! I got you a present that pooped in your stocking! Poop.


    Posted by aliceatwonderland | January 14, 2013, 5:05 pm
  7. Your dog is a cutie pie! Look at that face? That is not the face of a pain in the ass!
    People who buy dogs to shut their kids up shouldn’t even have the kids, let alone the dog!


    Posted by Life With The Top Down | January 14, 2013, 5:29 pm
  8. Cute doggie! People are dumb. I have a 700 SF apt and work 14 hr days, yet people act all shocked when I say it would be mean for me to have a dog! But…you can get a little one…or you have all weekend to play.

    What I want to tell them is that they can be the test dummies (pun intended). I will lock them in my apt for an entire month for 14 hrs a day with a couple of toys. Since I have no tv or pc, they’d have to occupy themselves somehow. As a favor to myself, I’d keep the bathroom unlocked so I wouldn’t have to clean up any pee or poo. Oh and I will be spending 2 of those weekends away in MI…have fun while I’m gone! If they would agree, i’d have them committed.


    Posted by 1jaded1 | January 14, 2013, 11:14 pm
  9. Seems to me that this phrase is more geared towards those children who want the dog for Christmas as opposed to being geared towards the parents who inevitably know they’ll be the one taking care of the dog in the long run. The parents, for the most part, know what the commitment is, but the children don’t. That’s how I take it. And at the same time I think it’s ridiculous because what child listens to reason?


    Posted by beefybooyawn | February 1, 2013, 9:36 pm

We don't tolerate scum.

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