Dearest Stuph Maphia™, it is time for another awards ceremony. You may be tired of them. Even more so considering that 4 hours of rich people and idiocy was just broadcast to our ignorant nation the other night. But fear not, unlike that awards ceremony, there will be no boobs song or no one tripping on their dress going up the steps. Hmmm…maybe this won’t be as entertaining as I originally thought. Oh well. The show must go on! And so it shall! Onward! And stuph™!
A devoted reader, prettywitgla33es, has honored this Unshitty™ little hole in the internet the Shine On Award. The only thing shiny around here is my armor, so that must be what she identified with. Or maybe she just really, really likes us. It’s hard to tell sometimes why people do the things they do. Like right now. I’m rambling on and on and on after having my second cup of coffee and the caffeine is just making my fingers type all these inane words and there’s really no reason for it at all. It’s like a game now to see how many words I can cram into this one paragraph. Wait, I think I’ve finally gotten tired of this. Have I? Yes. Geezus. Now I’m having a conversation with myself on my blog. For everyone to read. Now you all KNOW without a doubt that I’m certifiable. Just what I needed. Crap.
As usual, there are rules that come along with graciously (or reluctantly) accepting any award, so you must do so at your own risk. BUT, the rules for this award are not too awfully troublesome, so I don’t mind this at all.
- Link back to the blogger who nominated you.
- Nominate fifteen bloggers who shine a little light in your day and be sure to notify them.
- Share some facts about yourself or answer questions given to you.
I have already linked back to the blogger who nominated me (twice) because I like to exceed expectations, but only when I accidentally do so. This was completely unintentional so I therefore preferred to exceed my expectations this time. Yay me!
I have to nominate 15 bloggers for this prestigious award, and I will do so at the end of the post. I like to end these posts with a bang. No, not that kind of bang you perverts. Although a blog orgy could be fun.
I’m supposed to share some facts about me or answer questions now, but there were no questions posed for me to answer and I’m too wound up and too highly caffeinated currently to just spew random inconsequential facts out about myself. If there’s something you want to know, please feel free to ask in the comments. I will, however, come up with some questions so that my victims, I mean…highly talented nominees, can’t get out of this so easily. What I meant to say was that so you could learn more about those wonderful people. Something is wrong with me today, but I’m not sure what. I just keep saying all these things I don’t mean to say. What the hell is going on here!?!?! Eh…on to the questions!
- Who is your favorite comedian? Why?
- You try to silently let out a fart to relieve the pressure building up but, OOPS, it was a shart. What do you do now?
- Did you watch the Academy Awards? Why or why not?
- If you could have any person, alive or dead, guest post on your blog who would it be?
- You’re just standing there, minding your own business, when suddenly you feel your pants fall down to your ankles. You’ve been pantsed. What do you do? How do you get back at the asshole that did it?
Aaaaaaand now, the moment you’ve all been waiting for. Or perhaps praying for. Or maybe even dreading. It’s time to nominate 15 (oh my gaaawd) blogs for this incredible honor! Here goes!
- DJ Matticus
- Naked Blog Goddess, AKA MissFourEyes
- El Guapo
- The Cutter
Congratulations, suckas!!! I mean, winners. Damn, I still don’t know why I keep saying things I don’t mean to say. Oh, well. Until next time, Maphia™!!
Finally, I’d like to take the time to point out that this isn’t a one person show. There are two other bloggers who write here in this putrid corner of the interwebs, and I’d be an idiot, and an ungrateful jackass, if I didn’t mention them. Revis and Jaded, you guys, just as much as me (probably more so), make this blog as Unshitty™ as it is. Thank you both very much.
- Was taken aback by a picture that popped up in my Zemanta plug-in.
- Watched the shart video and laughed at the juvenile humor therein.
- I had to google the Shine On award, because the chain of blogs leading up to our nomination didn’t have the rules in them. And even that took some trial and error.
- Was asked by a fellow blogger to have Blunt Life Coach™ guest post. This will probably not end well…