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Enough is Enough, Facebook

There has been some unrest in the Facebook kingdom of late, and rightfully so.  It seems that Facebook selectively enforces their hate speech guidelines.  While ads supporting breast cancer are denied because they show a breast, images of a woman with tape over her mouth that say “don’t tap it and wrap it, tape her and rape her” are allowed to stay as they fall under the category of “poor taste” or “crude attempts at humor.”

#FBrape

Stay classy, Facebook (Image via thinkprogress.org)

Over the past week a movement has started to boycott Facebook and/or companies that advertise on Facebook.  People have left Facebook.  Companies have pulled their ads.  Then Facebook responded, albeit noncommittally. 

Many of my fellow bloggers are contemplating leaving Facebook and some of them actually did.  I considered it momentarily, but when I realized I’d have no way to keep tabs on the twins’ Facebook activity I decided not to.  Of course, it then occurred to me to deactivate their accounts as well, but I’m not sure they’d understand, though I suppose they need to learn to make a stand at some point.  I’m not sure I’m ready to explain to them what rape is.  I won’t be able to answer the inevitable question of “Why?”.  I have no idea why someone would rape another person and I have even further trouble understanding why someone would find it funny.

For now, I guess I’ll wait and see what changes Facebook will make (if any) in response to this criticism.  In their response they claim to be retraining the team who reviews content violations and promise to do better at removing gender-based hate material.

I would, however, like to deposit my two cents on this entire issue.  First of all, to the Facebook spokesperson who referred to the picture above as only a “crude attempt at humor,” I’d like to say that you, sir, are an idiot.  Not only is that picture a crude attempt at humor, it’s also advocating the rape of women.  Inciting violence against women.  Perhaps by the letter of your Hate Speech policy it’s not hate speech, but let’s use a little common sense here.  What if that graphic contained a photo of your mother?  Your wife?  Your sister?  Your daughter?  Would you be so quick to dismiss it then?  Would you merely shrug it off?  Or would you be pissed, as I am?

Secondly, if you want to defend the free speech of the moron that created such a graphic you must also defend the free speech of women who want to show pictures of breast-feeding and companies who wish to show breast-cancer awareness ads.  You cannot defend one person’s free speech while denying another’s.  Well, you can, but that makes you a hypocrite.  You either allow it all or deny it all.  You don’t get to pick and choose who’s allowed to have free speech.

Lastly, I’d like to say that I know FAR too many women who have been molested, raped, or physically abused.  I will not list them all here as it is not my place to, but even before I was on WordPress (where many victims talk about the injustices they suffered as a therapeutic release) I knew far too many women who had suffered some abuse or another.  Advocating rape is not a “crude attempt at humor” as there is nothing remotely funny about it.  I would wager if the idiot that created that graphic were raped (and, yes, men can be raped) he would be singing a different tune.  Mocking rape is hateful, plain and simple.  It is a horrible act in which the physical recovery is the least painful for the victim.  It’s psychological impact can be felt for years.  Crude attempt at humor?  Sure, laugh it up, asshole.

If it is indeed Facebook’s goal to “provide a platform where people can share and surface content, messages and ideas freely, while still respecting the rights of others,” then allowing content which advocates violence against ANYONE is counterproductive to that goal.  Facebook, you are not legally required to remove those obscene images, but if you’d like to keep myself and my children, along with millions of women and the men who will stand up for them, as subscribers, you’ll do what’s morally right and remove these barbaric images from your website.

Links

Facebook boycott

Facebook rejects breast cancer ad

Companies pull Facebook ads

Facebook’s response to criticism

One blogger’s interpretation of Facebook’s response

A call for Facebook to change

This post was inspired by today’s Daily Prompt.

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Discussion

192 thoughts on “Enough is Enough, Facebook

  1. I’ve not been on FB as much recently but I’d heard some rumblings about people being upset with it. Thanks for the 411. That meme or whatever they’re called is disgusting. It should fall under the “you just know it’s wrong by looking at it” category.

    Like

    Posted by donofalltrades | May 29, 2013, 10:32 am
  2. I hate it when the Constitution becomes a Bible – you must follow everything to the letter, no exceptions ever, it is unchangeable. I’m not sure why we have amendments to the Constitution in that case, but whatever. I’m tired of people hiding behind a flag or a religion and saying it’s okay for them to be total assholes – advocating rape because it’s “a joke” or not giving your innocent children medicine because your religion says not to – I don’t think so. Freedom of Religion, Freedom of Speech, all our freedoms are not just rights but responsibilities. If you stick to the letter of the law, then technically they can show these images (though not showing breast cancer images while showing this does, as you say, make them hypocrites).

    But let’s try a little something called “human decency” and “common sense”. Just because you CAN do something, doesn’t mean you should. And while you CAN post offensive images, people CAN leave your site. The problem is that Facebook knows enough people won’t leave because they either are addicted to it or that’s where their family members are, so they aren’t really going to change. The only thing that will really change them is losing droves, and I mean absolute droves of users, not a few thousand here or there. It’s all about the money to these people. It’s all they care about. Until we’re all ready to take an honest stand, they’ll keep doing whatever the hell they want to, and that’s the way it is.

    Like

    Posted by aliceatwonderland | May 29, 2013, 10:38 am
  3. Very good job, Twindaddy. That kind of thing is pretty vile.

    Like

    Posted by BrainRants | May 29, 2013, 10:40 am
  4. Thanks for the info. I was not aware of this.

    Like

    Posted by CJ | May 29, 2013, 10:42 am
  5. WELL SAID. Who knew my leaving Facebook would start this trend of boycotting?

    Like

    Posted by Rutabaga the Mercenary Researcher | May 29, 2013, 10:47 am
  6. Thanks for the head’s up on this one…ad just to let you know, men can be raped.

    Like

    Posted by Whoredinary | May 29, 2013, 10:49 am
  7. This is a great statement: “Advocating rape is not a “crude attempt at humor” as there is nothing remotely funny about it.” – perfectly captures the outrage people feel towards Facebook’s mishandling of the situation. (Do you get the feeling that the people who run that company are just a bunch of children? Oh right – they are.)

    HOWEVER… I refuse to transfer my anger from the people who post and share horrible things to the company whose site they post on. It is like never again speaking to the host of a party you’ve attended because you were hurt by one of his other guests.

    The problem has nothing to do with Facebook itself, or any of the other social media sites. The problem is the overwhelming lack of empathy these social sites foster. As we connect through the medium of the screen, we lose touch with the human on the other side of that connection.

    We need to solve the real problem, the lack of empathy, without blaming the website that provides (for free) the connection between us.

    Like

    Posted by jaschmehl | May 29, 2013, 10:50 am
  8. Grrrrrrr. Shocking, huh? That pic even surprised ME. And that doesn’t happen often. This. Is. Awful. I pray my 12 yr old daughter didn’t happen to see it.

    Like

    Posted by Shackled and Crowned | May 29, 2013, 10:59 am
  9. Facebook is notorious for stifling views differing from theirs. They stand behind the Constitution then deny space to Veterans Groups, the very people who have fought and DIED so the asshats at FB can be a big steaming pile of yak manure. I am disgusted .

    Like

    Posted by Fearless Leader | May 29, 2013, 10:59 am
  10. Obviously off Facebook, I hadn’t heard of this. This is reprehensible. I can’t even express how not funny that picture is; it makes me sad that someone could even dream that up. Thanks for sharing. Great post!

    Like

    Posted by jack joseph's mom | May 29, 2013, 11:11 am
  11. Without even seeing that, I haven’t used Facebook. Now I definitely do not want to use it. It’s hard enough when people tell you that you were asking to be raped, but now with it basically being supported, I want nothing to do with it. People don’t respect it or understand, and treat it as a joke. And they wonder why rape is so under reported.

    Like

    Posted by Not Quite Alice | May 29, 2013, 11:17 am
  12. As others have said, the issue isn’t just FB’s policy, it’s the attitudes of the people who use it. And it’s so easy to set up a fake FB account for the sake of posting this sort of stuff too.

    There needs to be some way of holding to account the people who post these images, as well as the people who moderate FB who allow the images through.

    Like

    Posted by faithhopechocolate | May 29, 2013, 11:17 am
    • Oh, there’s a system. If you post a picture that Facebook deems offensive you are banned from posting pictures for 30 days. The problem is the people at Facebook determining what’s offensive and what’s not. The picture in the post above was reported and deemed not have violated any Facebook policies. That’s when all of the action started.

      Like

      Posted by twindaddy | May 29, 2013, 11:22 am
      • Banned on one account, but there’s nothing stopping the idiots from creating a new account with which to post this hatred. And then another one, and another one, until they have, oh, 30 accounts to use to spread this. Part of the issue is that so many people think “it’s just the internet” and that as a result there’s no accountability. This goes for the FB staff as well as the users. While I think on, wasn’t FB started originally to allow Zucchini (like I’m going to try to remember his proper name) and his mates to find women to date? I’m not entirely sure that we should trust something that started out life as the supposedly ultimate way to attract a one-night-stand.

        Like

        Posted by faithhopechocolate | May 29, 2013, 4:32 pm
  13. Facebook doesn’t want to take a stand. They only do so when forced to. Only when sitting on the sidelines starts to cost them ad revenue. And when they do attempt to take a stand its as vague and as soft as possible. They don’t want to offend people. You know, the people who think rape is funny, and post about it on Facebook. There must be a lot of them. Or else this would be a pretty simple fix. Right?

    They suggest they want to let ME decide what I want to see and what I don’t? They want to leave it up to me to choose to not join a page that makes rape a joke? Thanks Facebook, but honestly, when you take away my ability to make a choice about seeing a picture of someone breastfeeding or not, but leave me the choice to see a woman who has been beaten or not…I think you’ve missed the point.

    Instead of creating a crack team of people to review these “gender based hate” pictures and pages, maybe just apply some common sense. Here are some guidelines: Rape isn’t funny. Murder isn’t funny. Violence isn’t funny. Breast feeding isn’t gross. Cancer (of any kind) awareness and support is necessary.

    I remember when I made the switch from Myspace to Facebook. Facebook was all new and shiny. It was like Myspace for grownups. Now its just gross. And pointless. It has only a desire to make money, and no ability or care to protect its users.

    Like

    Posted by lookingforward2012 | May 29, 2013, 11:27 am
  14. Twindaddy,
    Fuck Faceboook. I’m not going to deny the incredible work that Women Action Media has achieved, but I don’t trust Zuckerberg one bit, and although they are calling for change, my fear is that they are only responding in order to put out the fire, for the sole purpose of some public damage control. Time will tell. Until then, we shouldn’t let our guards down, and let’s keep on marching forward together.
    Le Clown

    Like

    Posted by Le Clown | May 29, 2013, 11:39 am
    • I’m not all that happy about Facebook either. I just recently removed a bunch of groups from my profile whom I had followed a while ago when they were funny, but then they turned it into a game to see how far they could go without getting banned. They were posting racist images and laughing about it when Facebook banned them. There are other alternatives to Facebook and with each comment I get here I’m more of a mind to take my account, and the twins’ accounts, and move over to G+. I cannot fathom why Facebook tolerates some of the shit that people post nor why they let repeat offenders keep coming back. I realize they can’t watch everything, but their response to the photo above is despicable.

      Like

      Posted by twindaddy | May 29, 2013, 11:46 am
  15. Is there nothing in US law about freedom of speech except for hatred?

    Like

    Posted by Daan van den Bergh | May 29, 2013, 11:58 am
    • Nope. Freedom of speech is not selective. There are hate laws which prohibit you from treating other genders and creeds hatefully solely because of their gender or creed, but Freedom of Speech is all-encompassing.

      Like

      Posted by twindaddy | May 29, 2013, 11:59 am
      • Great points by the way. The issue with laws against hate crime is that it seems to require a high degree of severity. On the other hand I do not think it is possible to make others get along. Placing laws to protect various groups of people seems to shift and sometimes fuel hate. This is at least what I have seen in my life in the US. I grew up in a small mid-west town that was mostly rural and I saw tons of hate and discrimination. To be honest, if not for having a good mother and moving away from that I may have fallen into that horrible place.
        In my life I have seen old classmates and friends die, go to prison and/or lose everything because of hate crimes against someone different than them, be it a person of another race or a different sex. I have also known and been friends with people of race crimes and women who are rape survivors. Maybe it impacts a person more when someone you care about goes through it. I find anyone who has done it to be disgusting. I had a close friend through the high school years, I found out he hit his girlfriend, we are not friends any more.
        Rape is such sensitive subject. It is personal and private when it comes to when it is OK to tell your children about it. I have three kids all under 5 and I have already thought about how we will teach them about such things. I personally feel that they should know about it as soon as sex crosses their minds. If they are old enough to have ‘the talk’ then I feel that they should understand the responsibility in all forms that comes with sex. Then that is my thought on the topic and even though it is private I am more than happy to share my thoughts as I am a rather open person.
        fyi, I have not had a personal profile on FB (my wife runs the Animockery FB page) for nearly two years and do not plan on going back. I do have a G+ though. oh and
        sorry about the ramble, one of these days I will just contribute again rather than “super comment”

        Like

        Posted by Animockery | May 29, 2013, 12:30 pm
      • Oh. In The Netherlands we have the right to free speech, except when that means spreading hatred. I thought that was a universal thing…

        I think I’m gonna delete my facebook-page, though… It’s just a page, one way traffic, but still, It’s traffic through these not human sons of bitches sites.

        Like

        Posted by Daan van den Bergh | May 29, 2013, 7:42 pm
  16. Absolutely disgusting. Never joined F*ckbook and never will.

    Like

    Posted by 1jaded1 | May 29, 2013, 12:15 pm
  17. You tell em, TwinDaddy. Seriously well said.

    But I beat you to this one. I also have to proclaim myself an oracle — because I figured out NOT to use Facebook before it even became popular. Damn I’m good.

    Like

    Posted by Elyse | May 29, 2013, 1:05 pm
  18. At this point I would settle for them being reactive. As in, “Hey that picture advocating rape is classless and hateful. I think I’ll remove it….” instead of, “Nothing to see here. Move along.”

    Like

    Posted by twindaddy | May 29, 2013, 1:28 pm
  19. Great rant. The hypocrisy of it all gets under my skin too. Common sense? What’s that? Our world, sadly, seems to be running in ever shortly supply of it. Hopefully, since everything is circular, we will be coming back to a period of common sense in the coming generation, because the alternative is terrifying.

    Like

    Posted by djmatticus | May 29, 2013, 1:36 pm
  20. WOW I don’t pay attention. I didn’t even know this was on there. *face palm* Does that mean I am just friends with people with morals?

    What is sad is that 1. people repost that shit. 2. someone posted it there to begin with 3. no one is surprised by anything anymore. we are slowly becoming immune and demoralized by barbaric/violent acts due to things like this.

    Like

    Posted by hansolosvagina | May 29, 2013, 1:56 pm
  21. Wonderful post.
    You have voiced my own concerns very well. I too am ready to leave FB. Again. Leaving before was due to the nuisance factor and cretinous scroll of political and religious crap.
    Have allowed my own daughter a FB account since the age of 14. When the silly teen attempted to delete me as a friend (GAWD MOM!) I threatened to delete her page.
    We gotta watch those little demons. They tend to take after us.

    The Demon Seed (my lovely daughter) is now 19 and a junior in college. She was the victim of rape last summer Her case was covered all over the world via several modes of social media, due mostly to the place and circumstances of the crime.
    We speak about her assault, and the good that complete strangers showed her after the attack. We also talk about FuckingFacebook(pat. pending) and their misogynistic money sucking business model. The users, the not-so-good people who qualify as sociopaths yet are allowed free reign in the name of free speech.

    She will never delete her account, hey she’s in college. She doesn’t want me to delete my account either as we message and share our sick humor on FB.

    Your post has helped make my decision. Thank you for sharing your obsevations and bringing this to the attention of people like me; people who had no idea so many others were becoming disgusted.
    Off to share your post with my kid.
    Take care and good luck!

    Like

    Posted by Rachael C. Black | May 29, 2013, 2:01 pm
    • Thank you for reading, Rachel. I think I’ve mostly made up my mind, too. I’m leaning towards removing my account along with my children’s. I know all of their friends are on Facebook, but it’s a simple thing to create a profile on G+.

      I’m sorry for what your daughter suffered. Too many women close to me have been raped and I can’t even begin to describe how that has affected me. But then to see shit like the picture above? Disgusting. There is absolutely NO defense for something so sickening. At no point is that funny or something that should be joked about. I’ve seen what rape does to a woman. I’ve seen the emotional trauma. It is not something to joke about.

      I hope your talk with your daughter goes well and maybe you guys can find another platform on which to chat. There are plenty of other services out there.

      Like

      Posted by twindaddy | May 29, 2013, 2:08 pm
  22. Unbelievable. I don’t know where I’ve been lately, but I haven’t heard anything about this. The fact that anyone would defend this picture’s right to exist, on a major social media platform no less, is disgusting.

    Like

    Posted by Katie | May 29, 2013, 2:51 pm
  23. Bring it!!

    Like

    Posted by behindthemaskofabuse | May 29, 2013, 4:36 pm
  24. Reblogged this on behindthemaskofabuse and commented:
    This is disturbing and I’m glad people are speaking up about it. Thank you Stuphblog for saying it for all of us!

    Like

    Posted by behindthemaskofabuse | May 29, 2013, 4:37 pm
  25. I can’t add anything better than what has been said. Well said. And thank you for saying it.

    Like

    Posted by Chatter Master | May 29, 2013, 4:43 pm
  26. Just a reminder…it’s not an issue of Free Speech regarding what has been discussed here about Facebook. It’s an issue of common sense and decorum. Facebook is a private company and does not fall under government purview when it comes to Free Speech. Their toys, their rules, no matter how despicable at times.

    Like

    Posted by Fearless Leader | May 29, 2013, 5:17 pm
    • Oh, I know. But their decision to censor certain images, such as breast-feeding, and denying ads, such as breast-cancer awareness, is where my problem truly lies here. Facebook is certainly within it’s legal rights not to remove these images (which I think I said at the end of the post), but they’d be stupid not to.

      Like

      Posted by twindaddy | May 29, 2013, 5:56 pm
  27. -throws flamethrower over the stupid-
    Okay kids it’s okay to come out and play again

    Like

    Posted by Rachael C. Black | May 29, 2013, 6:50 pm
  28. Bravo. And, thank you. There is a difference between a legal obligation and an ethical obligation — here’s hoping that people expect and demand more of themselves than the bare minimum that is required of them.

    Like

    Posted by PinotNinja | May 29, 2013, 7:19 pm
  29. I only learned this was happening on FB when Facebook actually decided to do something about it… I have a very wide definition of what constitutes humor, but the image above doesn’t even come close to it.

    Like

    Posted by List of X | May 29, 2013, 7:56 pm
  30. I didn’t know you have a Facebook account. *facepalm* :(

    Like

    Posted by Guilezilla | May 29, 2013, 11:21 pm
  31. Just shared on FB. Your words and the following conversation are kicking the ass of my neo-cortex ;)

    Like

    Posted by Rachael C. Black | May 30, 2013, 12:00 am
  32. Wow. Thanks for this post! I had heard something, but had no idea what it is. I’m going to have to consider deactivating my pages there, if they really think the above ad or similar ads are okay.

    E.A.

    Like

    Posted by asurvivorsvoice | May 30, 2013, 1:18 am
  33. Amazing post, thanks so much for writing it. I’ve seen people growing more dissatisfied with Facebook and its constant new “tricks” that raise a fair resentment. Earlier – infringement on users privacy, now this ugly stuff, and counting.

    For most people Facebook is a way of gathering in one place and keeping in touch with all those who we otherwise wouldn’t. For the creators and managers of Facebook it’s apparently some other intent, which is more than understood. They offered us a place to gather, we gotta “pay” in some way for being there.

    I don’t like Fb myself, but still keeping my account there, contemplating an eventual adio. Funny thing, most of the Fb users I talked about it with, also feel somehow irritated by this soc. network. But keep being there, what to do :)

    And yes, I’ve heard a few friends of mine (proactive fellow bloggers especially) have successfully dropped Facebook and are not regretting it.
    Among the reported benefits are a feeling of relief and a sudden influx of more spare time that can be used for some other useful activities.

    I’m still pondering on my decision to leave Fb as well.
    It feels similar to taking a decision of accepting no more awards on your blog – brave way to make a freethinker statement, but still takes some time to get ready for :)

    Like

    Posted by Sofia Siberia | May 30, 2013, 6:17 am
  34. I don’t use Facebook, I think this ‘crude attempt at humor’ comment is hokum, and I believe that someday, Facebook will crumble, and Zuckerberg will realize how stupid it is.

    Like

    Posted by monster1612 | May 30, 2013, 8:33 am
  35. We need a Facebook revolution! I did it to WordPress, and I can do it again. Ignite the flaming beavers of war!!!

    Like

    Posted by pouringmyartout | May 30, 2013, 11:23 am
  36. And wait… why was I not following you already?

    Like

    Posted by pouringmyartout | May 30, 2013, 11:24 am
  37. Reblogged this on hansolosvagina and commented:
    Brilliant piece.

    Like

    Posted by hansolosvagina | May 30, 2013, 2:51 pm
  38. I know that freedom of speech is often a slippery slope and I believe in playing Devil’s Advocate on the issue because I think it’s important to be able to do so. I do know that when I saw the image with the Tape Her and Rape Her, I was at work and I got so HULK SMASH angry that I couldn’t even stand it.

    Like

    Posted by stankmeaner | June 1, 2013, 10:50 am
  39. Ok, I have to comment on this one. I left FB few days ago, having an acount for full five days. I saw a numerous posts and comments wich were abusive, violent. I reported them all to FB, and they returned an answer- We find nothing abusive in these posts blah blah blah..

    If I saw THIS picture, I would really lose control. FB has gone wild.
    Facepalm on ME for even giving them a chance, no matter even if it was for only couple of days.

    Like

    Posted by Trigeminy303 | July 1, 2013, 4:52 am
    • It’s ridiculous what some people find funny. It really is.

      Like

      Posted by twindaddy | July 1, 2013, 7:10 am
      • Yeah. I thought of myself as a funny person, sarcastic, but this has nothing to do with “fun”. I assume you didn’t read my post in wich I describe a situation like that. Like that picture. How should I feel about this picture!? Or all the other women who have been in similar position? Disgusting.

        F*****ck f***k yourself.

        And Zuckerberg deserves that all of his shit he brought to the internet, including this picture, and himself as well, goes to oblivion.(wanted to say hell, but hey, I’m a nice lady :-) ).

        He should be prosecuted because of this!!!!!

        Like

        Posted by Trigeminy303 | July 1, 2013, 12:04 pm
  40. Good job twindaddy! I feel much more better, really. I’ll remember not to censor myself on your page. Mine is uncensored, but is mine, so…I say FUCK a lot there. :-)

    Like

    Posted by Trigeminy303 | July 1, 2013, 12:10 pm
  41. I don’t know why it took me so long to jump on your bandwagon, but I finally found the right on-ramp. Regarding Facebook, it isn’t so tough to be without Facebook. I withdrew about a year ago, and I have found that it is rather fun to be a nonconformist. I didn’t even have to buy a new wardrobe. Sure, no one sends me FB messages anymore, but it is nice to demand that people actually contact me directly to inform me. I think the straw that broke this camel’s back was finding out that my grandma died on a post from my dad. So classy!

    Like

    Posted by UndercoverL | July 6, 2013, 4:52 pm

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

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