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Thoughts from the Throne

Thoughts From the Throne: Road to Recovery

This is truly where Thoughts From the Throne comes from.

This is truly where Thoughts From the Throne comes from.

Wow. Its been a long time. I haven’t posted from the throne in ages. That makes me sad. It’s like, what have I been doing with my life? Oh, yeah. Sucking at it.

Anyway, I’ve been feeling a lot better mentally these past few weeks and I thought I’d offer some helpful tips which helped me through some of my most recent tough times and got me back to a place where I’m not necessarily happy but I’m not incredibly morose all the time either.

The first thing I changed was the music I was listening to. I listen to mostly rock music but even rock groups sing about lost love every once in a while. I would find myself listening to songs that related a little too closely to what was happening in my life. Then I would start dwelling on all the shit going on in my life and then I would get sadfaced.

So I rewired it!

I started listening to Weird Al all the time. I listen to him at home. I listen to him in the car. Not only does Weird Al not sing any songs that will in any way resemble any occurrences in my life, but he’s hilarious. Listening to his music instantly puts me in a better mood because it makes me laugh. Songs such as A Complicated Song, White and Nerdy, and Albuquerque never get old no matter how many times I’ve heard them. And they are always funny. Plus, I have found that I really, really enjoy the polkas.

I shoot the depression with this massive gun and kill it until it’s dead.

If you’re not familiar with Weird Al, he does a polka song on almost every album that is a medley of recent hit songs. Sometimes there’s a theme. Other times there’s not. Hell, on Alapalooza he did the entire Bohemian Rhapsody in polka. I’m not sure if I like his version or Queen‘s better. Here’s the polka from his last album, Alpocalypse:

Good times, right? I love it. (Editor’s Note: I just stopped writing this to watch that video. Winning!)

Next, I started enjoying my time more with the kids. When I was in my funk, I didn’t really do much with them. I was sullen and depressed and kind of let them do their own thing. No more. I play with them, Mostly Baby C because the twins are big, bad teenagers now. But I’m making myself do things with them and I’m enjoying it. Especially Baby C, who cracks me the eff up.

2013-06-11 06.55.50

I guess we’ll play later…

When I don’t have my children, I get drunkies. (Side note: When I try to type drunkies into my phone the autocorrect changes it to stinkiest. So when I attempted to tell someone the other day that I was drunkies, what I actually said was “I am stinkiest.” Awesome) I know a bunch of you nurturers and mothering types out there are going to get on me for this, but I don’t care. Alcohol puts me in a fantastic mood. It makes me happy. It also keeps my mind from wandering places I don’t want it to go or dwelling on things on which I’d rather not dwell. And just so you know, that means only getting drunk once one week and three times the next. So it’s not like I’m drinking every day.

Having crazy kick-ass friends to talk to. There are a couple of fellow bloggers with whom I’ve become very close in the last couple of months. We’re lucky enough that we can chat almost all day every day. We’re there for each other. We share are problems. But mostly, we just act silly. It’s a game to see who can make who laugh. We keep each other in good spirits and listen to each other when there’s serious stuph that needs to be discussed. Luckily, they had already made it past my walls before I put my armor back on otherwise I might have missed out on this opportunity to know them. They crack me up, and they’ve got my back. It’s an awesome fucking feeling.

This is probably more true than I care to admit.

I have been playing video games again. This is something I used to do often, but haven’t done in over a year, really. My game of choice right now is Madden 2013, and I’m kicking ass and taking names with my Cincinnati Bengals. Of course, Madden is the only place the Bengals have kicked ass and taken names since 1988, so I have to take it where I can.

Jim Nantz and Phil Simms, here. And we’re going to do all we can to make this experience as unenjoyable as possible.


These things, along with getting further and further away from the events that sank me, have helped lift my spirits the last few weeks. I’ve been in relatively good moods (not mopey…and singing along with the music in the car to and from work) and have been enjoying life a bit more. Of course, I have no way to know for sure that these things impact my mental state, or if they do how, but my general level of happiness increased when I started doing these things. It can’t be a coincidence, can it?

Audience Participation Time!


What kind of things do you do to cheer yourself up when you’re depressed?

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77 thoughts on “Thoughts From the Throne: Road to Recovery

  1. I think the hardest thing for me right now is shutting myself off from everyone. When I do see my friends, its like I have not a care in the world. The problem is when I come home alone and wake up that way, that I have a hard time dealing.


    Posted by luciddream85 | August 25, 2013, 12:11 pm
  2. First, I’m so glad you are in a better mental state. Kids will instantly make things funnier. Polka is awesome, especially in the stinkiest, state..WTF? Maybe you can do a playlist? Right now, it’s just one day at a time, for me.


    Posted by 1jaded1 | August 25, 2013, 12:29 pm
  3. I make fun of the Bengals. Always cheers me up.

    Seriously, though…I hear you on the music-front. I had to go from my normal hard rock to something less angry. I may have to check out this Weird Al guy…

    Video games are a lot of fun, usually it is Mario Kart or something that is fun and competitive. That also gives me kid-time, when he isn’t dragging me outdoors on a hike or something equally “good” for me. Exercise is a good one, so I plan to hit the gym in the coming weeks rather than stay home and risk going any lower than I am already (when I am alone, I tend to sleep too much). If I get lazy, then I can just stay home and paint my nails. And the kid’s nails. Maybe even the cats’ claws. Bright colors make me happy, even temporarily.

    All things in moderation when it comes to the alcohol. Just stay aware of how you are using it and reach out if you start to feel it isn’t working anymore. I am glad you are seeing some positive things through all of this.


    Posted by NotAPunkRocker | August 25, 2013, 12:52 pm
  4. I never get too depressed, but I never get too happy either… it just works for me…


    Posted by pouringmyartout | August 25, 2013, 1:06 pm
  5. Happy for you stinkiest! Stop the drinkin! lol


    Posted by behindthemaskofabuse | August 25, 2013, 1:19 pm
  6. I think all of us are glad you’re back and experiencing something resembling equilibrium. It’s tough to do most days when nothing is bearing on you in particular. I truly understand your reorientation and situation very well. Even the Bengals part – I’m a Raiders fan, which is depressing even with a winning season.


    Posted by BrainRants | August 25, 2013, 2:02 pm
    • Oh, man. I feel for you on the Raiders. It’s been downhill for the last 10 years…

      But, yeah. It’s weird when your moods do their own thing and your mind wanders uncontrollably and then you’re like…WTF just happened? But lately, I’ve somehow been able to catch myself when my mind starts to wander and stop it. I’m not sure how, but I’m doing it. Hopefully I can keep it up.


      Posted by Twindaddy | August 25, 2013, 2:04 pm
  7. I am a nurturing, mothering type but I am certainly not going to rip you a new one for getting drunk. In fact, I could use a night of the drunkies myself. lol
    & Video games were made by the heavens to provide us with joy. :D


    Posted by DaydreamsinWonderland | August 25, 2013, 2:57 pm
  8. Weird Al always brings a smile to my face too. I’ll sometimes listen to the polkas when exercising, and I get an extra burst of energy.


    Posted by The Cutter | August 25, 2013, 3:10 pm
  9. You know I’d cut a bitch for ya, TD.

    Loves and Stuphs,


    Posted by aliceatwonderland | August 25, 2013, 3:31 pm
  10. We just introduced our boys to Weird Al’s rendition of American Pie, the one about Star Wars. They only sort of get it, but we were wetting ourselves. Wine is always good. And a good cry. And writing.


    Posted by dhonour | August 25, 2013, 3:34 pm
  11. When I read your posts such as this one it is like reliving my brothers life post marriage break up. I hope in time you recover as well as he has. I know you do not always feel like this but it is not easy.
    When life was hard for me I had to go it alone. I do not talk to others and if I can i go away to walk somewhere where there are no people. Preferably in the mountains where I can feel how insignificant my life is. It helps me get perspective. Thankfully its been a while.


    Posted by tric | August 25, 2013, 3:38 pm
  12. I’m so happy to read this post and glad you are getting some happy back in your life. You deserve it!! Hugs to you.


    Posted by Polysyllabic Profundities | August 25, 2013, 5:09 pm
  13. You had me at douchebag. :)


    Posted by merbear74 | August 25, 2013, 5:20 pm
  14. All of the above… except Madden because I really suck at playing it… and tennis. I really suck at tennis and I don’t know why. It is a damn shame. I am glad you’re keeping a stiff upper lip (I am sure the helmet helps with that). I hope one day to be among that list of real blog friends, TD. I am a tad bit insane.


    Posted by UndercoverL | August 25, 2013, 6:53 pm
  15. Singing makes me happy. So does writing, especially when I can release the hurt instead of dwelling on it.


    Posted by Elyse | August 25, 2013, 8:28 pm
  16. I’m one of those “turn into a recluse (as in a hermit, not the spider *sigh* Or the crab, dammit. You know what I mean.) ” when I’m depressed types. I have to force myself to get out of bed, let alone leave the house when I start going down. I cheer myself up by being funny. The lower I am the funnier I get, go figure. Knowing I made someone else laugh cheers me up. I’d do the drunkies but my drunkies card was revoked ;)


    Posted by C.K. Hope | August 26, 2013, 12:10 am
  17. Drinking, dancing around my house, listening to 90’s pop songs and wearing a onesie.

    Ps. How good is Weird Al?!


    Posted by Daile | August 26, 2013, 1:08 am
  18. Noise. Lots of noise. When I get in the funk, silence just makes it worse, so I’ll walk around the house turning every entertainment outlet on. And reggae music helps too. The only thing is when I listen to Bob Marley, the sensual reggae beats mostly always makes me wanna light up a doobie, so that’s kind of a risky .method


    Posted by theyoyoblogger | August 26, 2013, 1:15 am
  19. Eat. Eat. And sleep. And molest my cat in too-intimate-embraces. But currently enlightened with ‘Quiet : the power of introverts in a world that won’t stop talking’.” I’m going to preach this thing one day.


    Posted by The Laughing Duck | August 26, 2013, 2:25 am
  20. Copius amounts of red wine on the weekend,,,and looking forward to my future, in my own new pad,,,,shortly ;)


    Posted by overitblogdotcom | August 26, 2013, 9:57 am
  21. Write, drink, watch movies… the stuff I do normally. It helps me calm down and get on with things… If I try to change up my routines, or if I try to do something that isn’t “me” that’s when the depression hits harder and have a tougher time getting back to normal.
    I’m really glad to hear that you’ve been doing better!


    Posted by djmatticus | August 28, 2013, 6:47 pm
  22. TD,
    I totally get you on the music. When feeling like a huge pile of donkey poo, listening to chirpy music with positive or ridiculous lyrics makes the donkey poo walk itself to the muck heap. If it weren’t so annoying, I’d get “Is this the way to Amarillo” on my ipod just for this sort of occasion… http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xx8l5l1g0wA just to share the ridiculousness.


    Posted by faithhopechocolate | August 29, 2013, 4:28 pm

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