Bigstuph Blog – Thoughts from Steve

Over the last couple of years I have been working in my head what it means to follow the “narrow road”. In Matthew 7:14, Jesus said, “But the gateway to life is very narrow and the road is difficult, and only a few will ever find it.”
I have been really working through this in my head. After reading Crazy Love by Francis Chan and Radical by David Platt, along with countless hours in the word of God, I am concerned about how narrow my path really is.

The American dream is in direct contrast to the Gospel message, and yet everyday I feel like I give the majority of my time to the American nightmare.

My wife and kids have made a conscious decision to lighten our dependence on worldly possessions, and yet I don’t feel like my life is difficult. Despite the typical worries of running a business, paying bills, and keeping my head above water, I live a pretty simple life.

I usually take two showers a day, I eat what I want, when I want it, and I usually go back for seconds. As we burn away our dependence on worldly possessions, I still feel like my “moderate” standard of living is still somewhat excessive.

I want God’s eyes. I want to walk this narrow road with the few that God has placed in my life. Something tells me that what I envision as narrow, and what Jesus illustrated are two different things. For the most part people like me. I very rarely feel isolated or persecuted. Although I do feel crazy sometimes as many of my friends have told me that you can’t take Jesus’ words literally…such as love your enemy, bless those that curse you, turn the other cheek, etc.
Jesus may your ways become my ways. May my image of the narrow road be the image that brings your glory in my life.

As much as I want life to evolve around me. Today I realized it does not! Over the last few weeks I have been asking the question, “what does it mean to deny myself?” In order to follow Christ I need to deny myself, take up my cross, and follow Him. I call myself a Christian, but am I following Christ?
Today it hit me like a ton of bricks. God’s will is opposite of My will. In order to follow Christ, I have to surrender EVERYTHING. My selfish will is built around what I want, how I want the world to see me, as well as how I can control my world.
I am “out of control”. I never have been in control, I just think I am. In order for me to live out my Christian walk, I have to start by denying myself. In order for God’s spirit to work through me, I must deny myself.
Until I deny myself, I am only fooling myself. Today I surrender. Tomorrow I must start over.

Here is a thought.

What would it take for YOU to never lose faith in God? I have been chewing on this all day. I have seen so many miracles over the last six months as we have launched our Crazy Love in Action ministry. Our ministry is dedicated to identifying those that are idealistic in their faith, empower those that are idealistic (through a social network of like-minded people), and mobilize this group to action as they become the hands and feet of Jesus.

This ministry launch has been under attack since God began to shape it in our hearts. Francis Chan’s book, Crazy Love is just the beginning of where we want to take this ministry. Our goal is to shake up the American Church. Please pray for us to stay the course.

The question of what would it take for us to not lose faith in God? If Jesus Christ himself came into my room, and woke me up and then spent 30 minutes telling me about creation, walking on the earth, and staying focused on the tasks at hand – Would this be enough to never make me doubt my Lord? God has delivered in such amazing ways over the last few months, and yet I forget so quickly how good God is and how much He loves me.

God, forgive me for my lack of faith, and for not trusting you, the creator of EVERYTHING.

Please pray for our ministry, www.crazylove.org
We want to shake up the American church.

If you want to help, let us know.

I am sitting in the airport in Fort Lauderdale, waiting for my wife (heather), and my son Josh to fly in from Orlando. I just arrived an hour ago when I flew in with Will McGinness from Nashville. I am flying to Haiti for the first time tomorrow morning for a chance to see what Mark and Will are doing with Hands and Feet. This is a ministry started by the guys from Audio Adrenaline that serves orphans in Haiti. They have a children’s village that is changing the world in that region.

For years my wife and I dreamed of the opportunity to come to Haiti and find a ministry that we could partner with that was making an impact. In 1986 my wife’s dad passed away in Haiti when he was serving as a short term missionary. He was rebuilding a roof on a church and fell and tragically died on his trip.

My wife and I are so excited to get a feel for what her amazing dad experienced before he died. He was only 46 years old when he died, but what a life he lived. Hundreds of people were impacted by the life and tragic death of this amazing man. Tomorrow we step foot in a land that has in some ways has become forgotten. What can we do to make an impact? We can tell our story and let God do the rest.

Tomorrow is LONG overdue. Dear God, Bless our efforts to impact your kingdom.

During my 5 month sabbatical I was “introduced” to Francis Chan, although I can not recall who told me about him.  After watching a handful of videos, I started to listen to his podcast sermons.  The guy was speaking TRUTH from God’s word.  He was wiping away the grey that I had let filter into my life.   When I was 14 years old, I was hospitalized after a water skiing accident.  I was trick skiing and I was “attempting” a helicopter.  This trick was being performed for about 12 or so spectators that were riding in the boat.  My attempt to hit the wake and do a 360 failed and I shattered my right femur.  As a result of the accident I had to be in the hospital for 6 weeks in traction.  The trauma of the accident somehow punctured my right kidney with a quarter size hole.  In order to see the hole in the kidney I had to have an x-ray with iodine.I was severely allergic to the iodine, and my throat closed up and eventually my heart stopped beating.  I was in and out of consciousness for 45 minutes or so.  After it all ended the doctor came in and said “son you were on your deathbed, God must have a purpose for your life, because you should not be here” Shortly after this experience, I began to felt called to shake up the church.  I use to read scripture as a 14 year old and recognize the obvious differences between what scripture says and how I was living my life.  I read scripture in a “black and white” fashion.  This “idealism” for seeing God’s word for what it was slowly went away over the years, and although I have always felt called to “wake up the church” I began to live my life just like everyone else. Until I ran across the sermons and the book Crazy Love by Francis Chan.  This reading scripture for what it says, rekindled my spirit and desire to learn more and so I was provided the chance to spend sometimes up to 8 hours a day in God’s word.  This went on for weeks, then months.  During this time the word of God became alive again.  More to come… 

As many of you know, I took off for 5 months beginning August 15th 2009.   I took off to find myself again.  Why did God put me on this earth?  What is my purpose?  Why am I here?  I had spent 16 years building a business for what reason?  About four years ago we came up with a cool mission for our Stuph brand.  It was simply this – To leverage our resources to change this world.  It all sounded good, but what does that mean?The purpose of my sabbatical was to simply find out what it meant to leverage our resources to change this world.  About a month into my time off, I decided that in order for me to find my way, I needed to decided which way that would be.   Towards the end of September, I decided that it would be the narrow way.  I had heard that term my entire church life, but I was confident that I was not on the narrow road.  What was different in my life than anyone else?  What was in my life that screamed to the world that I was passionately in love with God?  Not much quite honestly.  Sure I did the right things for the most part, and certainly said the right things most of the time, but I was tired of working so hard to keep my head above the spiritual waters.  There had to be a different way. Sometime in mid October (two months into my sabbatical) some one told me about a guy named Francis Chan.  To this day, I can not remember who told me about this guy – but a few days later I googled Francis Chan and this is what I found http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LA_uwWPE6lQ I watched and instantly knew that I liked this guys message.Stay tuned…this story gets really crazy