Bigstuph Blog – Thoughts from Steve

Over the last couple of years I have been working in my head what it means to follow the “narrow road”. In Matthew 7:14, Jesus said, “But the gateway to life is very narrow and the road is difficult, and only a few will ever find it.”
I have been really working through this in my head. After reading Crazy Love by Francis Chan and Radical by David Platt, along with countless hours in the word of God, I am concerned about how narrow my path really is.

The American dream is in direct contrast to the Gospel message, and yet everyday I feel like I give the majority of my time to the American nightmare.

My wife and kids have made a conscious decision to lighten our dependence on worldly possessions, and yet I don’t feel like my life is difficult. Despite the typical worries of running a business, paying bills, and keeping my head above water, I live a pretty simple life.

I usually take two showers a day, I eat what I want, when I want it, and I usually go back for seconds. As we burn away our dependence on worldly possessions, I still feel like my “moderate” standard of living is still somewhat excessive.

I want God’s eyes. I want to walk this narrow road with the few that God has placed in my life. Something tells me that what I envision as narrow, and what Jesus illustrated are two different things. For the most part people like me. I very rarely feel isolated or persecuted. Although I do feel crazy sometimes as many of my friends have told me that you can’t take Jesus’ words literally…such as love your enemy, bless those that curse you, turn the other cheek, etc.
Jesus may your ways become my ways. May my image of the narrow road be the image that brings your glory in my life.

This year two words come to mind as I look to set goals.
Dependence and Contentment

This year I want to be content and completely dependent on God. Interestingly enough these two characteristics are somewhat “childlike” in their origin.

Lord, Help me to be childlike in my ways in 2010

My faith has always had bumps in the road where I lose sight of simplistic nature of how God wants me to trust Him.
Every time that I get in these “funks” I usually find my way out after talking to my 11 year old. She is one of the most godly people that I know. She loves the Lord, but her faith is enormous.

Everytime I have a tough decision to make, I go to her and ask for her opinion. And usually she points me to a simple question – What will make God happier? She believes that God’s way is the only way. She also believes that God can do anything. She also has seen her guardian angel on many occasions. She in many ways points me to God in all she does.

Matthew 18:3-5 (New International Version)

3And he said: “I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. 4Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.

5″And whoever welcomes a little child like this in my name welcomes me.

I need to become like a little child to enter the Kingdom. No longer will I look at what is safe, or prudent, or better off for me and my family. I want to look at what is going to make God happier. I love my sweet daughter. She is a spiritual giant.

I am sitting in the airport in Fort Lauderdale, waiting for my wife (heather), and my son Josh to fly in from Orlando. I just arrived an hour ago when I flew in with Will McGinness from Nashville. I am flying to Haiti for the first time tomorrow morning for a chance to see what Mark and Will are doing with Hands and Feet. This is a ministry started by the guys from Audio Adrenaline that serves orphans in Haiti. They have a children’s village that is changing the world in that region.

For years my wife and I dreamed of the opportunity to come to Haiti and find a ministry that we could partner with that was making an impact. In 1986 my wife’s dad passed away in Haiti when he was serving as a short term missionary. He was rebuilding a roof on a church and fell and tragically died on his trip.

My wife and I are so excited to get a feel for what her amazing dad experienced before he died. He was only 46 years old when he died, but what a life he lived. Hundreds of people were impacted by the life and tragic death of this amazing man. Tomorrow we step foot in a land that has in some ways has become forgotten. What can we do to make an impact? We can tell our story and let God do the rest.

Tomorrow is LONG overdue. Dear God, Bless our efforts to impact your kingdom.

This week I have been on spring break with my family.  My oldest son Taylor is graduating from high school in a couple of months, so we wanted to make this one special.  God has been doing an amazing work in Taylor’s life.  Over the last 8 months or so, God has become real to me in a whole new way.  Ironically the journey that my oldest son is on parallels my faith journey in so many ways.  I am so very proud of my son.    

A year and a half ago, Taylor suffered a severe head injury playing football.  He was the middle line backer for his high school football team.  At 225 lbs, and a 6 foot frame he was built for football.  In November 2007 he suffered 3 concussions in one football game.  His helmet was defective.  He had no air in his “air cushioning”.  

For nearly two months we watched Taylor struggle to differentiate from his right and left, or even complete simple addition or multiplication.  He was slurring his words, and his short term memory was shot.  We had him tested, and the neurlogical psychologist informed us that in 3 of 4 the measurables, Taylor either did not score at all or was below the 10 percentile.  He had the cognitive ability of pre-schooler in some areas. 

Two months later he began to acclimate back to school, but it was extremely difficult for him to get back to “normal”.  He was unable to take the ACT test for college until the fall of 2008.  He was unable to even finish the test in two sections.  In order for him to concentrate he is on Concerta, which allows him to focus, but it makes him almost OCD (based on the amount he has to take), and as a result he was unable to skip over questions he did not know on the ACT.  

The bottom line we were beginning to determine that there could be some lasting effects of his head injury.  It has been very painful to watch an amazingly gifted student athlete unable to proudly proclaim with confidence where they are going to college.  But I would not trade it for the world.  Taylor has found God in a whole new way as a result of this experience.  He now wants to serve God as a missionary in one of the most persecuted regions of the world.  He told me today that he wants to sell his pick-up truck and buy a beater, so he can give the rest away to those in need.    

This 18 year old young man has found God and has inspired me to give EVERYTHING to follow Christ. Pray for Taylor as he finds his calling.  This week, while hanging with the family at the beach, I have seen him reading the Bible 3-4 times a day.  He can not get enough.  God is filling him up for a reason, a purpose, a calling.  Thank you God how you work.